I can mark time walk a straight line
Grab a mad bull by the nose
I can stand still on an ant-hill
And not once get itchy toes
I can even for no reason
Be as nice as I am rude
But I can't get you to love me
I just can't get you to love me
What do I do?

I can stand up put my hand up
Where perhaps it shouldn't be
I can go down to a hoe-down?
Have one hell of a yippee!
I can also if you must know
Do whatever else I choose
But I can't get you to love me
I just can't get you to love me
What do I do?

All of my life I've been waiting
For a moment like this
And now that I've found it
You know something's amiss
Can't get you to love me...

I can tell tales hammer toe-nails
Write a letter to the Queen
I can easily and discreetly
Be as charming as obscene
When I feel light

I can take a fight
But I know one thing for sure
I just can't get you to love me
I just can't get you to love me
What do I do?